Many of us have had some form of sex ed back in junior high and high school. Our parents may have helped deepen our understanding of sex and, along with our friends and peers, certainly played a role in shaping our beliefs, fears, myths, judgements, and confidence. It is often the case that young children…
My Blog
A Bed Isn’t Just For Sleeping — Unless It Is
You’ve really needed a new bed, and the day has finally arrived that you and your sleeping partner hit up the mattress store. So many choices! Pillow top, euro top, springs, no springs, the latest in memory foam — it can be bewildering. You spend some time rolling around, pretending to sleep and watch t.v…
Long Distance Relationships
What I’ve learned about long distance relationships —a guest post by a twenty-something Recently in my life, long distance relationships have been coming up a lot. I know people at both ends: ones that resolutely refuse to even consider them and others that really think they can work. One of my friends is currently giving…
When someone says they need to talk…
In any relationship the “need to talk” comes up, as it should. Friends want to talk about a list of things, siblings, possibly the same list with a couple of tweaks, and bosses, a somewhat different list. Your intimate relationships can sometimes have the scariest or most joyous talks of all. Sometimes you may feel…
It’s Not You; It’s Me
Yikes! That’s not something you typically want to hear. Sure, it’s a gentle way of breaking up, but it’s still breaking up. And to top it all off: What if it is you? Relationships end for all kinds of reasons. Maybe it’s true, maybe the person saying “it’s not you…” really means it. You’re great…
It Only Takes a Few Seconds
When you and your loved one/s are busy and short on energy it can be really hard to connect. Breakfast for the kids, meetings all day, and folding the laundry can all equal exhaustion. All you want to do is just sit and veg. But somewhere in there you also really want to feel close,…
Ouchie
Recently I heard a tale of a young woman who went to her gynecologist complaining of pain during intercourse. And I must say that if you are experiencing pain during intercourse you should always pay a visit to the doctor. There are a number of reasons intercourse could be painful — STIs or cancer are…
Wait, Where is She From?
In this crazy, modern world of ours we see more and more people dating outside of their own culture. While plenty of people around the world and even here in the U.S suffer from oppression and hate, the light is growing at the end of the tunnel. Dating someone from a different cultural heritage can…
Hard and Soft Limits
You’ve made a list of your yes, no, maybe’s and now you need to specify what your boundaries are within those “yes” activities! First and foremost you need a safe word. A word that means “no”, but is a far away from “no” as you can get, like giraffe. It needs to be something that…
Yes, No, Maybe So
A great way to maintain clear boundaries in your relationships is to have a “Yes, No, Maybe” list. And having more than one, for different elements of your relationship is even better. Often times people use it for sex, sex, sex, sex, sex! Getting together with your sexual partner/s and making this list can open…